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Traditionally, the words “empathy” and “sympathy” have often been used interchangeably. In today’s world, however, “sympathy” is very much out of fashion (even associated with condescension), while “empathy” is all the rage. People are often heard saying, “I don’t want your sympathy; I want your empathy!” In this essay, we will explore the profound difference between these two concepts. We will discover that while sympathy is rooted in biblical truth, empathy, as it is commonly understood, is not only unbiblical, but it leads us into sin. This essay seeks to explain why empathy is actually a distortion of God’s design for love and compassion.
First, let us clarify the definitions. The Oxford English Dictionary (2nd Ed.) defines “sympathy” as “the feeling of compassion or commiseration towards the suffering or sorrow of another.” By contrast, “empathy” is defined as “the power of projecting one’s personality into (and so fully comprehending) the object of contemplation.” The OED also tells us that “empathy” is a translation of the German word Einfühlung, first coined by the German philosopher Theodore Lipps in 1903.
Empathy, in its most common form, is defined as feeling what another person feels—stepping into their emotional shoes. While this may seem virtuous at first glance, it is ultimately an impossible task. Scripture teaches us that the heart is deceitful above all things (Jeremiah 17:9), and no man can truly know another’s heart or emotions in the way that only God does. “For who knows a man’s thoughts except the spirit of the man which is in him?” (1 Corinthians 2:11). We cannot fully experience someone else’s emotions; our attempts to do so are mere projections, often misled by our own biases and assumptions.
Clearly, there is some overlap between sympathy and empathy (hence their interchangeability), and sympathy often does (but does not have to) involve feeling the other’s emotions as we observe their suffering. But when the goal itself is to “project our personality” into another’s experience and “truly feel what others feel,” we open ourselves to emotional manipulation. This is where empathy becomes dangerous. Empathy places the control of our emotional lives in the hands of another, allowing them to dictate our feelings and responses. The Bible calls us to “guard your heart, for out of it spring the issues of life” (Proverbs 4:23). We are to be masters of our emotions, not slaves to them. We are to be masters of our emotions, not slaves to them. When we surrender this control, we invite manipulation and move away from God’s will; empathy misses the mark (ἁμαρτία) and becomes sinful.
In contrast, sympathy is the biblical approach to compassion. It does not require us to adopt the feelings of others, but to recognise their suffering and respond with care and concern. The Bible repeatedly calls us to be compassionate, merciful, and loving (Ephesians 4:32, Colossians 3:12). Sympathy allows us to look at someone’s pain without losing ourselves in it. It enables us to see sufferintg objectively and act accordingly, without being swept away by emotional currents. It is rooted in truth, not subjective feelings. We are able to care for others not because we feel their emotions, but because we understand their suffering through the lens of God’s Word.
The rise of empathy in modern discourse can be traced back to the postmodern rejection of objective moral truth. Philosophers like Jean-Paul Sartre and Michel Foucault championed the supremacy of “lived experience” over any universal, objective reality. This philosophy teaches that each person’s emotions and experiences define their truth, and thus, we are to shape our responses based on these subjective realities. But such a view is antithetical to the biblical teaching of objective truth. Jesus declared, “I am the way, the truth, and the life” (John 14:6), affirming that truth is not a fluid construct shaped by personal experience, but an unchanging foundation.
Defined this way, empathy makes it impossible to practice love in accordance with God’s Word. If we allow “lived experience” to dictate our moral responses, how can we practice biblical love—love that seeks the good of others, even at the cost of personal sacrifice? How can we seek the “good” of the other, unless we are clear on what “good” is according to the objective reality and metric given in the Bible? In this way, we can see that empathy, by seeking to conform our actions and emotions to another person’s subjective experience, makes it impossible for us to even love them in a way that aligns with God’s revealed will. In contrast, sympathy, rooted in biblical compassion, allows us to respond in ways that reflect God’s truth and love, loving others with wisdom and discernment.
Empathy may appear kind and compassionate, but it ultimately leads us away from the truth. It demands that we conform to others’ emotions and makes it impossible to practice the sacrificial, objective love that Scripture commands. Sympathy, however, allows us to care for others with wisdom and truth, responding to their suffering in ways that honour God and genuinely seek their good. Let us, therefore, reject empathy in its modern, distorted form and embrace biblical sympathy as the true path to love and compassion in a fallen world.
